Aug 6, 2012 - Daily Devotional    No Comments

Hurt People will Hurt People

Hurt-to inflict with physical pain : to wound or damage

Everyone at some point will be hurt. Everyone at some point will hurt someone else whether intentionally or unintentionally. The problem is most people do not heal properly. Then they hold on to it causing it to be more toxic.  Being hurt is a door opener for a wounded heart that builds up resentment from the time of entry. I have done counseling over the years and was forced to look back on my life. I had to recognize pivotal points in my life where I was significantly hurt by someone else.

Basically, a timeline and a list of people so I could recognize several things.  a.) where it started  b.) who it was with   c.) discern patterns  d.) ultimately break free and heal.

This exercise I would challenge each of you to do, not to dwell on them but to heal. Because of this exercise, I was able to recognize my insecurities, and face fears that had tormented me for years. Your door points can be very small to very traumatic.

For instance, the first entry I wrote down of  when I was hurt the most, was when I was going into 5th grade. My older  (only) sister was going into 7th grade. Keri and I would sleep in her room in bunk beds (even though I had my own room) most of the nights during the week all growing up. The night before school started she locked me out of her room. She said she was going into Jr. High and could no longer let me sleep with her b/c that was childish. I was devastated. That hurt and affected me so much, literally our relationship to this day has never been the same. Now let’s be clear, there were a number of things after that instance which brought about resentment that hasn’t even been restore to date. I know some of you are thinking that is so small, yes it is, but I rebelled at that point. Because we didn’t grow up in a very forgiving or communicative household it just grew like a disease. I have since asked for forgiveness on my part for the years of hate I spewed, but it takes 2 willing parties. This relationship years later (as I am 37 yrs old) has yet to be restored and going on 5 yrs of not talking)–Pray for me on that one

Another entry of hurt is more extreme. Years later in college I became pregnant with my boyfriend at the time who was Catholic (and remember I was atheist til the age of 22 yrs old) I aborted the baby (I was 21 yrs old) and it was the worst experience of my life mentally. Even though I willingly chose the abortion, I knew without a shadow of a doubt something was very wrong with that. As far as the boyfriend, he begged me to keep the baby. Not only did I go against his wishes, I broke up with him, never to see him again. He died 3 yrs later of Heart failure at 25yrs old.

There is a very deep spiritual significance to his death not doubt, but it is also the point that led me to Christ.

I had 15 other entries in my timeline where I was able to see how I was deeply hurt. Then how I  hurt someone else. I am thankful to say, I have repented and Jesus has begun healing me. Even though looking back can be painful he Can and Will do the same for you.

Psalm 9:10
Those who know your name trust in you,  for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you

 

 

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